happy-not-lucky?

It's hard to know what to do because your natural rhythm may be disrupted by something that is totally out of your control. Fortunately, your positive attitude can help, but you'll need to be willing to settle on less comfort than you prefer normally. Keep in mind that whatever happens today is part of a larger shift that can take months to process.

So I know it's hard to care about someone else's horoscope (I'm a Cancer, in case you are too and can enjoy yours for the day), but I wanted to remember this one because it is bang bang bang on.... save for the fact that I don't know what happened today that's going to take months to process. Maybe I don't want to.

But I do know that I woke up disappointed today. And I was trying to regain my energy and I know it's up to me and only me to do this... so I went for a run. But instead of enjoying all the endorphins, I suffered burning ears from the cold. And then I went for a facial for full relaxation, and now my skin's reacting to the treatment. But THEN I had a really amazing dinner and, well, there was no bad reaction to that (except my tummy is sooo full of goodness).

Anyways, I'm sitting in this place where I'm not sure if I should keep trying trying trying and deal with the mood-altering consequences, or if it's easier to just sit back, relax and secretly hope it all works out.

If you always wake up late...

you'll never be on time. Oh, BSS is so wonderfully wise.

You'd think this would be a lesson easy enough for a four year-old to master. And here I am, at the age of 26, trying to trick myself into believing that if I stay up until 1 a.m. I'll still be smart and bubbly in the morning. Logic will most definitely break my heart. This is an ode to indie bands, apparently.

I finally realized I'm losing a bit of control. Well, the state of my apartment has been saying so for the past couple of weeks. But you wanna know the clincher? My pretend bar contains a mere two bottles of wine. What is that? And I tried both tonight. One was too sweet; the other, too bitter. I need to start tracking my wines to avoid such great disappointment.

Note: This is the first night that I've blogged and not jogged. Can you tell the endorphins were missing?

It must have been something

It's on my mind. I don't know why.
I cry sometimes. But I don't miss you.

Watching films about relationships is emo-exhausting. Especially when you're not in one (or just missed one). That's when you're forced to remember a disappointment or three, and mourn the loss just one more time. Maybe that's why when I'm without a living, breathing date, I pair my romantic films with wine. And it only takes two glasses before I spill a few woes.

But wait a second. I'm spoiling this blog within three posts by sounding like a 16-year-old girl, ready to spin Tori Amos. I should write about endorphins again! And how they make you feel like singing in the springtime, winter, summer, fall.

Tonight's lesson: The quickest way to crush little endorphin spirits is to watch an Edward Burns' film. (But it won't crush your crush on him.)